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Victim Mindset to Compassion Mindset

Updated: Oct 6, 2022

It’s true to say that most of our suffering in life has been caused by other people. I don’t think I have ever met someone who hasn’t been hurt by another. Sometimes this hurt can give us more compassion towards others, but more often it can put us in a victim mindset. Once in a victim mindset, we feel anger and frustration towards others. We lose our compassion, and our frustration only makes relationships more difficult.


When we are reminded of this hurt, we see certain people as a threat and lose our compassion towards them. We still crave companionship, friendship, love and adventures; however we are too focused on our lack. This creates high expectations towards others, and we seek out unhealthy relationships to fill this void. When we are in the energy of lacking, we either give too much or take too much. When this balance is lost, we lose our control over life in general.


To create more meaningful harmonious relationships, we need to heal the wounds of our past and change our perspective. I will give you an example on how our perspective works:


A woman is selling her home. The first couple come to view the property and ask her what her neighbours are like.

The woman replies, ‘Well what were they like where you lived?’

The couple reply, ‘Our neighbours were all so nosey, always wanting to know your business, they had no respect for anyone else but themselves.

The woman replies, ‘That’s exactly the same here.’

The second couple come to view the property and ask the same question ‘What are your neighbours like?’

The woman again replies, ‘Well what were they like where you lived?’

The couple reply, ‘Our neighbours were lovely, always happy to help you out, mind your house when you were away, and we would get together for regular meet ups.’

The woman said, ‘That’s exactly the same here.’


The moral of the story is that the way we see people is purely down to perspective. There is good and bad in everyone, but we view others based on our past experiences. If we were cheated on in the past, all we see is betrayal. If we were bullied, all we feel is vulnerability.


How about if we change our perspective and only see the beauty in others. To enjoy the company shared without expectation and disappointment. Open our eyes to their needs and focus on an equal balance of giving and receiving. Let go of our past hurts and move forward with a positive mindset. This improves our feelings of self-worth, and we attract more stable relationships that are more supportive of our needs.


I offer an Energy Trauma Healing course designed to help you let go of the past and bring more peace, love and abundance into your life. To take your power back so you can live a more joyful life full of everything you deserve!

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